The Parental Intelligence Newsletter

9 October 2011

Hi, this is Bob Collier inviting you to 'explore the psychology of happy and successful parenting', connect with bright minds, discover new ideas and sail outside the mainstream for a while without running aground.

All that and more.

In this issue of the Parental Intelligence Newsletter there are links to 20 articles and 6 notices and items of news. As always, I trust you will find in my latest collection of parenting, education and personal development ideas and information from around the internet something that will make a positive difference to your life - and, through you, to the lives of your children.

Please scroll down to pick and choose whatever is of interest and useful to you.

Thank you for being here! I appreciate this opportunity to be of help to you in your parenting adventure and wish you all the happiness and success you would wish yourself.

See you next time!




Revealing The Secrets To Pain-Free Natural Childbirth
by Tracey Rose

Sydney mother Tracey Rose had to convince nurses at Manly Hospital she was in labor with her first child after she admitted to feeling no pain.

Tracey is now revealing the secrets of her pain free natural birth and wants to help other expecting mothers enjoy the miracle of childbirth without drugs.

Read more ...

The Risks You Take When You Don't Share A Bed
by Tarantamom

The truth about family bedsharing/cosleeping is that it is the safest, most natural thing in the world. People who share a bed with their children sleep better, have happier children, and have lower stress levels. Before I delve into its many benefits, however, I want to take a look into an aspect of co-sleeping that not many people talk about...that is, the risks you take when you do not share a bed with your baby.

Read more ...

Prepare: The Learning Curve of Breastfeeding
by Danielle Rigg, JD, CLC
One of the biggest keys to succeeding at breastfeeding is to set your head for a learning curve experience. Learning to breastfeed is no different than learning to swim, knit or sing: there may be bumps along the way, but keep your eye on the prize and before you know it, you'll be doing great!

Read more ...

Discipline in Question
by Ronit Baras

The topic of disciplining kids is going to be forever hot for every parent. It is a hot topic because it bothers many parents and it is hot because too many parents find themselves in a huge conflict over it. Here is a question I got about discipline from a reader...

Read more ...

Discipline as Brain Food
by Chris White, M.D.

The brain grows optimally when the parasympathetic nervous system is turned on.

The parasympathetic nervous system is turned on when our needs are met. When we have a belly full of food, when we are feeling safe and cozy in our mother's arms, and when we know our parents are confidently in the lead and are looking out for our best interests. When a loving alpha meets our needs, we grow and develop most optimally.

Read more ...

Myth Series #1: I Can Control How My Kids Turn Out
by Jeff Sabo

For those of you who don't know much about my background, let me simply say this: I like control, in a variety of shapes and sizes. Of course, in my mind that's not necessarily a bad thing, especially given my history. I spent several years coaching and playing ice hockey, a game which, despite the way it is perceived, is one of structure and discipline. I have two college degrees, which while they did not involve all that much brain work, certainly required discipline and control to complete. I served nearly eight years in the Army, a quintessential example of control in action. And for the past 12 years or so, I have made my living in the world of business, surrounded by spreadsheets and data and facts which had to be analyzed so that detailed plans could be written and followed. So for me, in my life, and in my circumstances, there is a place - and a need, actually - for control.

Read more ...

Force Fed - The Detrimental Habit of Forcing Food and Information on Children
by Laurette Lynn

Preparing dinner for my family one night I experienced first a frustration and then an epiphany! It was a frustration I suppose many mothers experience followed by an epiphany only few of us do. I'm thankful for the latter and am driven to share the significance of this revelation.

Read more ...

Natural Consequences
by Rue Kream

Being cold because your mother decided not to bring a coat for you so you'd learn a lesson is not a natural consequence.

Read more ...

So you're thinking of homeschooling?
from The Path Less Taken

Is your child in school, but you're considering homeschooling?  Here are six steps, or things to keep in mind,  to get you started ...

Read more ...

Want a Healthier Family? 12 Health Benefits of Homeschooling
by Linda Dobson

A family's homeschooling decision almost always begins with academic considerations. For myriad reasons, each family comes to the conclusion that the children will learn better and happier when the family is in charge of decisions, resources, and schedule.

There's another aspect of homeschooling, though, that doesn't receive anywhere near the attention it deserves when mainstream media covers the topic. Once they get started, many families realize terrific health benefits emerge from the homeschooling lifestyle, too.

Read more ...

Unschooling: A natural way to learn
by Carista Brewster

When our son turned three, my husband and I decided that instead of enrolling him in preschool, we would explore homeschooling. My husband was no stranger to the idea; he was homeschooled for almost six years. I was a product of Philadelphia Public Schools, with a mother who had me practically living at the library starting when I was about three.

While still not the norm, homeschooling is becoming more popular.

Read more ...

The nitty-gritty of how and why unschooling works
by Lauren

Unschoolers have largely relied on anecdotal evidence through personal networks (and now social networking) to gain confidence in their chosen method of educating their children. However, published research is available which provides not only an insight into the powerful and effective nature of informal learning but also presents some fundamental challenges to many of the assumptions underpinning conventional educational theory.

Read more ...

The Evidence of Years
by Deb Lewis

I've been looking through old pictures, reminiscing about my kid, and I've been writing about those days with him, when he was little.

I was inspired to do this by my mom's steadily fading memories. Things she did yesterday are gone. Things she did as a younger woman are growing fuzzy and confused and are no longer reliable markers of a lifetime of work and kids and hopes and dreams. I wanted Dylan to have something solid to hold onto about his childhood if the day comes when my own memories of those times fail. I wanted him to have something to show his kids if they ever wonder about his life when he was young.

Read more ...

Cultural Ideas and Change
by Deb Lewis

Around 1976 Richard Dawkins came up with the term "meme" to explain the way certain ideas spread among people and become part of culture. The idea is that a meme, a new idea (or an old one you never heard before) can get into your head via the spoken or written word or through observation and stick itself to your idea. Then like the Borg, it forces your idea to submit to the new one and then to replicate the new idea by inspiring you to tell someone else.

Read more ...

Adults, not children
by Sandra Dodd

Don't worry about them. Delete "socialization" from your vocabulary. Give your kids so much love and self-confidence that peer pressure will mean nothing to them. They will be pressure-proof.

Read more ...

The NLP Spelling Strategy
by Robert Dilts

Spelling is an important and fundamental language skill that does not come "naturally" to everyone. In fact, intelligent people who otherwise excel in the classroom, even in language abilities, may experience strong and even debilitating difficulties in spelling. According to NLP ability with spelling is not a function of some kind of 'spelling gene' but rather the structure of the internal cognitive strategy one is using as one spells. Thus, if people experience difficulty with spelling, it is not because they are 'stupid,' 'lazy' or 'learning disabled' but rather because they are trying to use an ineffective mental program.

Read more ...

How to Avoid the College Admissions Game
by Maya Frost

Okay, I already wrote a whole book about that, but at this time of year (back to school) I tend to do a lot of head shaking about the angst expressed by parents and students who still believe they have to do things the traditionally hyper-competitive way.

That's so Old School, but I'm not going to launch into my tirade here.

Instead, I'll share a happy email I received this week from a student who is thrilled to be on a different track. 

Read more ...

The Psychology of Self-Directed Learning (Part 1 of 4)
by Blake Boles

This is the first in a four-part blog series about the psychology of self-directed learning that underpins the ZTC [Zero Tuition College] strategy.

Read more ...

The Weaver Becomes the Web
by Michael Mendizza

Screen based technologies are all 'virtual'. To have an appropriate relationship with a virtual reality one must first have a well-developed physical, emotional, cognitive foundation in what used to be the only reality - natural experience and relationship based perception.

Read more ...

5 Video Game Stereotypes Debunked
by souzie23

Video gamers have come a long way since since the days of arcades and the Mario Brothers, but many of our stereotypes remain. Now that 72% of American households play video games, let's hit the reset button and take a fresh look at the lifestyle choices gamers are making.

Read more ...


Nursing Is Normal

"A photographic display of mothers nursing their child in various public settings. Our goal : the more often we see mothers nursing in public places, the more accepted it will become."

Watch the video at (5 mins 6 secs)

Sleeping Like a Baby

"Parenting expert Pinky McKay argues that controlled crying and other current trends are restrictive and can add to the stress faced by parents. A more natural, intuitive approach to settling your child, Sleeping Like a Baby will help you understand normal infant sleep at each stage of development, from birth to three years."

Special Offer applies at time of writing.

More information at

This Hurts Me More Than It Hurts You

"This Hurts Me More Than It Hurts You: In Words and Pictures, Children Share How Spanking Hurts and What To Do Instead is not another parenting tome by an ivory-towered theorist. This eye-opening book is written and illustrated by those most affected by spanking - children. Their words and drawings show that spanking doesn't result in the behaviors parents and teachers desire."

Find out more at

The XOG October 2011

The latest issue of psychologist Don Asbridge's new online video magazine.

In this issue: an awesome run through of how the mental health industry operates in the American public school system, often doing more harm than good. Also ...

"The XOG Editor has written and posted a petition for President Obama's consideration.  Please consider signing it!
Goal:  5,000 or more petitioners in the month of October for significant positive change."

Read the latest issue of The XOG and find out more about the petition at

Australian Unschooling Conference Retreat

October 28-November 1, 2011

Airlie Beach, Queensland, Australia

Find out more at

Always Learning Live Unschooling Symposium

December 28-31, 2011

Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA

Find out more at

Thank you for reading the Parental Intelligence Newsletter!

The next issue of this newsletter will be published on or about 23 October 2011

Subscribe now and stay in touch

Published by Bob Collier, Canberra, Australia  

Email: bobcollier[at]parental-intelligence[dot]com 

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